whose eggo would i preggo?

So as I was watching another classy episode of 16 & Pregnant, it got me wondering who I would preggo if I was a dude. Definitely not Scarlett Johansson because she's just too much of a druggie for me. In my opinion, when she talks it sounds like nails scraping on a blackboard. Also, I probably wouldn't wanna make bread in Megan Fox's oven either. She's too .. well.. ummm... dumb? I mean sure, those tattas are like two scoops of maple ice cream to guys but underneath the hotness, it's just a shell. She's probably sweet, and nice, and enjoys photography, and sushi but nothing else. NOW, the people whose caves would be blessed by my bears include Penelope Cruz, Jessica Alba, and Zooey Deschanel from 500 Days of Summer. These women are smart and beautiful and would make great mommas. Umm, just to clarify I am 120% straight. I only say these facts about women because i like to look at things from a male perspective. Anyways, women are way too whiny and demanding for this chick.